Face Regimen for Sensitive Skin

Screw Darwin. He makes me feel nervous. I'm pretty sure I should've been plucked out of the gene pool, but here I sit pecking away at my computer keys. Living the dream. When people find out about my food allergies, if they don't say it, I know they're thinking, "how or why are you still alive?" I'm a tenacious little turd, that's how and why.

My food allergies/sensitivities include but are not limited to: kiwis, oranges, grapefruits, chocolate (*GASP*), spicy food (think Along Came Polly), gluten, milk of almost every kind (soy, lactaid, rice, and etc.) except for coconut milk (take me to the island, mon), egg yolks, super fatty/greasy foods, onions (leeks are okay...weird), and my brain is starting to shut down now. I need to end my list. I think depression is starting to settle over my thoughts. It never seems awful until I say it all. Er, type it. Oh, beans are not a sensitivity, per say, but even I don't want to be my friend after I've consumed them. After all, beans, beans, they're good for your heart....

My other allergies/sensitivities include: wool, down (It was nice to know that my eyes were not puffy every morning because I went to a raging party and blacked out, suffering from a fugue. Instead, my comforter was poisoning my face.), ragweed, dust mites, tobacco, random foliage, and I hate the scent of almost every perfume, especially vanilla scented stuff. My students pollute my airways, and then I threaten to throw up on them. They put away the lotions.

Anyhoozer, finding face wash was a bear. (I'm currently experimenting with lotions and body washes. I'm hoping the Sephora shipment does me proud.) Allow me to tell you what I use for my delicate epidermis.

Face Wash: Burt's Bees Sensitive Facial Cleanser

(I bought the intense hydration cleanser, and then I realized it has orange in it. DOH.)

I like this face wash because it's creamy, gentle, and does not rival the cost of my undergraduate education. $10 is a pretty good price to me. You can find this stuff at Target.

Face lotion: Cetaphil Daily Moisturizer

(I buy it at Target, too.)

One of my college friends recommended this stuff. It's light, hydrating, and not all greasy. 

(For once, the advertising on the packaging is actually honest.)

It helps that it's not overpriced, either. 

Eye cream: Neosporin Eczema Essentials Hydrocortisone Cream

(on Amazon for $7)

Okay, okay, I know you're giving me the WTF face right now. 

You're thinking, "really? Anti itch cream around your eyes? You're crazy."

At least it's not hemorrhoid cream because I've used that, too. It works wonders for puffy eyes. 

I'm not kidding.

Here's another sad truth for you: I have eczema, and it likes to break out around my eyes if they get too dry. Seriously, this stuff keeps my eyes from getting all itchy/puffy during allergy season, hydrates like a pro, and prevents the skin around my eyes from going all boa constrictor. I actually read an article recently about using hydrocortisone cream to treat acne. Maybe I wasn't too far off base when I came up with this little remedy for myself. 

The Clarisonic Mia ($110)

Yeah, I know there are cheaper models out there, but my face is worth it to me. I know that when I buy cheap hair straighteners, I end up spending more money on five cheap ones in a year than I do on one good one that lasts for several years. I feel like it all evens out.

I thought this thing would be a flop and that I would regret spending the money. This vibrating beauty proved me wrong, and it feels so right to be so wrong. What I like about it is that I feel like it actually pulls all of the dirt and make up out of my skin. Just washing my face with my hands wasn't getting off all of the make up. Mia takes care of business. 

Note: I bought the brushes for sensitive skin, and I do not like them. I feel like they don't work as well as the original brush that came with it. However, if you have a lot of active acne, the sensitive brushes might be best for you. 

Face Mask: Aztec Secret Indian Healing Clay

(here it is at Amazon)

Wow. I went to the health store near my work and picked up some of this stuff. It's green clay, and it's magical. I think it's made from unicorn horns. It gives you the directions on the back, but I'll tell you that you mix this powder with apple cider vinegar. You smell like a salad bar, but it works. 

It's not super expensive, it lasts forever, and it's all natural.

And maybe you like smelling like a salad.

WIN.

When I want to splurge, I get this stuff.

Yeah, I'm obsessed with Fresh. 

I really want to eat a salad right now, but it's like 11p.m. My 5a.m. self will be so angry with me if I actually eat one. I'll refrain. 

Instead, I'll creep myself out by watching this...