Monday, January 30, 2012

The best dance partner is a furry one.

This picture makes me laugh because of Roxy's creepy little sneak attack in the corner of the shot. Do you like how we're both wearing the same colors, khaki and white? I thought you might.

Honestly, I should not have Jeff take my picture at night. After a long day at school, I look harried and wrinkled. (Well, my clothes look wrinkled; I look harried.) However, I look much like a zombie in the morning, so there's no good time for him to take my picture.

Also, why must I ask him to take my picture after I've eaten two helpings of lasagna? Not smart.


Squirty likes to dance with me and lick my fingers. She's my little bud.

Like our dining room? I especially like the enormous stack of papers at the end of the table. Classy.
I love this dog so much. Yes, I love Roxy too, but she doesn't cuddle up with me as much as Squirt does. 

Anyway, why are you here? You're here to know where I found these clothes. 
Pants and top on clearance at The Limited
The shoes are Jessica Simpson shoes. 
And, the necklace? Well, I am not entirely sure since I've had it for ages. Probably Kohl's
The belt is from NY & Co.

I'm thinking about purchasing off-white curtains for our sliding glass door in order to brighten things up a bit. What do you think?

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Why must Banana Republic be so expensive?

The video is quite short, but if you want the Reader's Digest version, here it is on the right.

Sweater: Target
Blue and white striped button down: Banana Republic
Silver belt: NY & Co.
Jeans with bedazzled butt: NY & Co.
Hair: learned how to do it on YouTube

When monkeys attack

In this video, you get to see how much monkeys love me, my hair when I was a brunette, and an interesting character who makes an appearance at the end.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Spring Fling

Spring Fling


Long coat
$19 -

Pink handbag
$40 -

Tear drop earrings
$24 -

Forever 21 buckle belt
$5.80 -

Orange you glad you checked out this ensemble?

 This might be my favorite outfit so far. I love orange as I'm sure you can tell from both my outfit and house decor. Warm colors make me think of sunshine, and who doesn't like sunshine (unless you're a troll, in which case, you're a weirdo)?

I love Steve Madden boots. They fit my smaller calves. 

My classroom is always cold, and this outfit kept me warm because I was wearing a tank, a button-up, and a sweater. (My legs do not get cold as easily, so I was fine with exposed knees.)

Sweater: LOFT
Belt & Button Up: Express
Skirt: The Limited
Boots: Steve Madden (

You know why I like this outfit so much? I was wearing something from almost all of my favorite stores. To top it off, I could've added something from NY & Co.

Tell me what you think of today's outfit :)

Saturday, January 21, 2012

So FRESH and so clean!

Just me hanging out in my bathroom and telling you about some of the beauty products that I like.

Friday, January 20, 2012

Dentists, Doctors, and PT, OH MY!

Yesterday, my mom endured mouth surgery. Thus far in my life, nothing has compared with tooth pain, so my heart goes out to Momma dearest. (Though I imagine childbirth is quite possibly more painful on that richter scale.) When I was talking to Momma dukes on the phone, I explained how there are certain things I just don't understand about the dentist. This conversation made me think about how there are several things that confuse me about doctors/dentists/medical personnel in general. Seeing as how I've had lots of experience with medical professionals (some not so professional), I feel like a self-proclaimed expert. To avoid writing what could be a novel, I'll offer up the condensed version, which I will likely extrapolate upon at a later date.

The Dentist

Why is it that dentists almost always feel compelled to ask you questions while your mouth is filled with a suction tube, mirror, clamp (something out of a Saw movie), dental dam, and what can only be described as an ice pick on steroids? You've been shot with 32 needles filled with Novocain and your tongue feels like a rabbit's tail. Do they really expect you to formulate a lucid response? I consider myself lucky if I don't walk away with driblets of my own blood caked to my cheek and dry patches of my own saliva stuck to my chin. I appreciate the niceties, but they're not coming at a really convenient time, doc.

The Doctor's Office (a general sick visit)

Before you go to the doctor for a sick visit, do you ever feel like typing up what's wrong with you and printing out five copies of it so that you can hand the sheet to each of the people you have to retell your sick story? I do. You walk up to the front window to sign in. They ask why you're there. Luckily, you can provide them with the cliff notes version: "the plague." After you wait in the waiting room, a nurse calls your name. (In my situation, they call me by the name I don't go by, which is my first name, so it always takes me a moment to realize they're calling me.)

Said nurse takes you back to another (this time smaller) waiting room. She motions for you to sit on the crinkly paper, which you always question whether or not they changed after the last patient. She asks you what's wrong. You try the Reader's Digest version: "the plague." Her quizzical expression and one raised eyebrow suggest that she's dissatisfied with this response, so you're prompted to provide her with more details: "lots of phlegm. dying. faucet in my nose. fire in my throat. elephant on my chest." She just nods, says nothing, and takes your vitals. As she exits the room, she tells you that the doctor will be in shortly, which always translates to 15 minutes of staring at the same poster about symptoms of the common cold and a 1980s picture of a duck. 

The doctor enters. At this point, you're tired of waiting. You wish for your warm pillow and your parting gift, a bag of drugs. He asks you what's wrong. You wish for that printed copy of symptoms to hand to him. Instead, you explain that, according to your research on WebMD, you have a rare case of the bubonic plague. He does not believe you. He writes you a prescription to see a psychiatrist, which you plan to do after you pick up the antibiotics made for fighting the family of mucus featured on those Mucinex commericals. Before you leave, he needs to poke at you a bit. You hesitantly lie back on the crinkly, likely germ-infested paper. You're convinced that he asks you where it hurts for the sole purpose of tapping, jabbing, and poking that very spot while asking, "Does that hurt?" You think to yourself, "No, it does not hurt. It feels like the breath of angels and butterflies," but you simply squeak a meek "yes." Eventually, you are allowed to slink out of the office with your stack of prescriptions and your goody bag. You touch no door knobs, and, the moment you plop into the car, you promptly sanitize your hands. You vow never to get sick again.

The Physical Therapist
After I broke my butt, I had to make a trip to the physical therapist. Here's how a typical visit to the physical therapist went: walk into room crowded with injured people, spend five minutes with the physical therapist, and waste the next 45 minutes independently alternating between positioning myself on all fours while arching my back like a cat and lying on my back while thrusting my hips skyward. Explain this to me: why must I be forced to complete publicly humiliating exercises in the middle of a fishbowl when I could be making an ass of myself in the privacy of my own home, where only my husband and dogs can laugh at my expense? Now, if the physical therapist actually watched me do these exercises to be sure I was properly following through, then I'd make peace with feeling violated. However, the physical therapist leaves the twenty-something year old to fend for herself. I guess you don't matter when you're not an athlete or an old person.

Please do not mistake my befuddled musings for disrespect toward the medical profession. I would not want any one of those jobs, and I recognize how strapped for time each one of them is. Dealing with sick and injured people all day does not sound like a dog walk in the park. However, I reserve the right to be confused by "the system" and certain practices, just as plenty of people happily (or not so happily) voice their opinion about the system that is education. I will likely post again on this topic, and I do not intend to offend (or single any one person out), just amuse.

If I do offend you, then here is some sage advice for you: take a chill pill, pet a fluffy puppy, eat some Fruity Pebbles, and grow some thicker skin!

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Enter Jeff's contribution to my blog

Jeff's cell phone rang today. Officially, on January 30th, he's starting day shift for another position. Yay! I will finally, after six months of night shifts, have my husband. Let married life begin!

In today's video, Jeff is showcasing his push up skills, and Squirt is showcasing her creeper skills. I suppose Jeff is toning that sexy body for our much-anticipated mini trip to Florida in February. For you newly married women with husbands who want babies, I have an idea. Like me, you can hijack your reproductive system until your husband takes you on at least three trips/vacations. Hey, before my body transforms in ways I don't even want to fathom, I must make some romantic rendezvous with Jefferino.

Here are my terms:
1. The trips need to involve a plane ride.
2. The trips need to be at least three days.
3. One of the trips needs to be five days.
4. One of the trips needs to be either Bora Bora or Italy. (I'd prefer Italy, but I'll take Bora Bora.)
5. I can amend the terms at any given moment because I'm a woman, and I reserve that right.

I hope you enjoy our video today. It's slow to start because Squirt got camera shy, but it picks up. I promise.

Just so that you can understand how weird Squirt is, ANY time we lay on our stomachs, she has to situate herself between our legs. Here are some pictures of her at this very moment.
My butt makes a formidable pillow.

Monday, January 16, 2012

How to fold a sweatshirt...yes, a sweatshirt.

So, here is today's outfit. I was too excited to put on pajamas last night to worry about making a video or asking Jeff to take pictures of my outfit. It was really cute, too. Oh well.

Anyway, this video shows you how to fold a sweatshirt. With my old folding method, I would pull sweatshirts off the shelf in my closet, and it would mess up the folding I did on the other sweatshirts. By the end of the month, they'd be a big messy heap of sweatshirts. This folding technique solves that problem. Hooray. That's what I get for creepily observing a store employee while she folded a sweatshirt.

Friday, January 13, 2012

These boots were made for walking...

I should plan what I say before I post videos. 
Whatever, I prefer the extemporaneous experience.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Caramel popcorn grows on trees

This video is more about my antics than it is about my outfit.
I really hope it amuses you.
If it doesn't, I'm sorry.
I'll do better next time.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

No blisters!? No way.

 Every time we have an "outfit of the day" photoshoot, Roxy wants to be a part of it. She's licking my hand here.

So, Mother Nature backhanded me today. I was so puffy that these were the only pants I could find that fit. Wow. These jeans have a bedazzled butt, and they're from NY & Co.

Mom bought me the purple leather jacket from Kohl's :) It's Elle brand.

Oh, I love my curl cream. It's sold at Target. It's called Curls Rock. It's a cream with lotion-like consistency. I've used A LOT of curling products. This one is by far the best. 

 Look at my cute girls :)

Shirt is from NY & Co. (last spring), light blue tank is from Express, and belt is from Pac Sun. 

(Please excuse our messy living room.)

These heels aren't a problem because they're only about an inch or so. They're Candie's brand from Kohl's. Since they're patent leather, I would recommend getting Band-Aid Friction Block to prevent blisters. I rub this stuff on anytime I wear shoes that rub, and I don't end up with blisters (seriously). Buy a few and put them in your purse/work bag. You'll be glad you did it!

Here's what it looks like. You can find it at Wal Mart or Target :)