Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Blue Blazer & Polka Dots

This week, my co-teacher and I decided that wearing jeans every day this week is perfectly acceptable. Luckily, our dress code is not super strict. 

I've realized that my go-to outfit consists of a blazer, nice top/t-shirt, jeans, and flats. 

One of my students said that she will pick out a nice outfit to wear but feel too lazy to put it on. I told her I'm the same way, which is why I come up with two outfits. 

I come up with:

Outfit A: I feel like looking cute and actually getting dressed today, so I'll wear this.
Outfit B: I'm too bloated/tired/hangry to put on anything that's not forgiving, but I still want to look cute, so I'll wear this.

Today's outfit is Outfit B.

Outfit Deets:
Blazer: Express (similar)
Top: White House Black Market (similar)
Jeans: The Limited 
Flats: Jessica Simpson via Marshall's (similar)

Linking up here and here

Liebster Award

Kaitlin over at Tea & Sequins nominated me for the Liebster Award about ten days ago. I'm a huge slacker. Of course, aside from grading stacks of essays every week, my grad class also requires reading a novel every week. I have also had TWO group presentations back to back. Anyway, thanks Kaitlin! 

The rules are:
1. List 11 facts about yourself.
2. Answer the 11 questions that the blogger who nominated you gave you.
3. Ask 11 new questions for your nominees to answer.
4. Nominate 11 more bloggers with less than 200 followers.
5. Let each blogger you've nominated know that you have chosen him or her for the award.
6. Thank the blogger who nominated you and put a link back to his or her blog in your post.

The facts:
1. In elementary school, my daily wardrobe consisted of leggings (of all colors...even the kind with stirrups) and flannel shirts. At 28, I've replaced colored leggings with colored skinny jeans, and I still sport flannel like a lumberjack. 

2. I know all of the words to "How Many Licks" by Lil Kim and "College Girls are Easy" by Easy E. Singing all of the lyrics was my party trick in college. Little white girl's got game.  

3. My favorite novel is The Alchemist. If you haven't read it, go read it right now. I'm giving you homework. 

4. For as long as I can remember, my brother has called me Shithead. Before that, it was Fartfignewton. I collect awesome nicknames. 

5. I've painted almost every room in my house...twice. We've lived here for a little over three years.  

6. I can't stop moving furniture. I love arranging and rearranging it. 

7. I have the best parents even my intern said so. 

8. I've been skydiving. I want to go again! 

9. The first and only bone I've ever broken was my a car accident.

10. My sports career ended the day I shot for the wrong team in middle school basketball. 

11. I can't stop eating avocados. 

Kaitlin's 11 Questions for Me:

1. Why did you start blogging? As you may or may not know, I grade the papers of extremely talented teenagers. I needed a creative outlet to save me from the madness. 
2. What's your accessorizing philosophy? Less is more? Pile it on?
    People whom I do not call "me" can pull off the piled-on look. As for me, I grumble and fuss at bracelets because the darn things clunk around, smack at my computer keys, and generally seek to piss me off. I'm pretty much a necklace and/or earrings kind of gal. 

3. If you could swap closets with one blogger for a day, who would it be?
   ONE day? If we swap closets, do I get to keep whatever I want and never give it back? Can I put on everything all at once? How do I choose one thing? Okay, fine, I choose Kendi. I can't resist her plethora of blazers, stripes, and bright colors. Plus, her self-depracating posts always amuse me. I'm not sure how that personality trait translates to trading closets, but that's my story; I'm sticking to it. 

4. What is the best vacation you've ever been on?
   I guess the obligatory answer would be my honeymoon, which I did love because it was with Joof, and we went to Arizona. LOVE that state. However, it's really a toss up between Jeff's sister's wedding in St. Thomas (I fell in love with that island) and our trip to the Bahamas where we met friends who live in NY. Maybe we can convince them to move to Maryland? We're SO excited for their wedding in August! 

5. What's your go-to store when you've got some cash to spare?
     I am a woman of convenience, so I stick with what exists within five minutes from my house: Target, Old Navy, New York and Company, and Marshall's but never Wal Mart. The one near me is scary. Ever been whistled at by a toothless hillbilly?  

6. What's your dream job?
     Is it cool if I tell you that I love my job, but I just want the "system" to be less screwed up and for my drive to be way less than the hour it currently takes? A lot of other jobs sound appealing, but I know I'd really miss teaching my knuckleheads.    

7. Do you have any pets?
     Two nutjobs we call Squirt and Roxy.

8. Online or in-store shopping?
    It's about to get weird (surprise surprise). The mall freaks me out. If I feel too far away from an exit, my stomach starts to churn and my mouth goes dry. Is middle-of-the-mall-I-feel-like-I'm-in-retail's-bowels phobia a real thing? As a result, I prefer outlet shopping because I can quickly reach fresh air. Oh my gosh, typing out that confession confirmed my lameness.    

9. If you had to move to another country, which would you choose?
     Italy because then my husband would have to speak Italian without my whining, "Say something sweet in Italian." Of course, that would also force me to stop willfully neglecting to learn the language. Plus, I could frequently visit the settings of Under the Tuscan sun, my favorite movie. Oh, Diane Lane, I love you. 

10. Who's your celebrity style icon?
       Emma "Even Girls Crush On Me" Stone. Not only does girlfriend rock nerdy, comfy chic, she makes every hair color look hot.  

11. What's your best advice for people who want to start blogging?
       I'm going to get all English teachery on you for a moment. My best advice has nothing to do with choosing a topic you love, being genuine, posting only when you want/feel moved to, or networking like a spiderweb--though all of these suggestions are sage. Instead, I'm going to tell you what I tell my teenage students: your writing is a reflection of you. If you don't want people to think you're a raging a-hole, then choose your words carefully. If you don't want people to think you're a bumbling idiot, then proofread what you write. Occasional errors are understandable, but consistently, unabashedly mangling the English language (or any language) is unacceptable. And who wants to end up on Get Off My Internets?   

My Liebster Nominees: See, I think a lot of the people I have on here are at or around 200 followers :( Or, they've already been nominated and don't want to answer more questions! 

Sunday, April 21, 2013

And it was all yellow...

Okay, it was not all yellow. There was some navy and white, too.  I just like that Coldplay song, so I thieved it for the purposes of my post's title.

Why, when a casual Friday stares me in the face and I'm given a free pass to wear blue jeans, do I opt for a less-than-casual outfit? Now, some of you might be thinking, "Ummm, Wo, that's casual, girlfran." I assure you that, in comparison to my colleagues and especially my students, this outfit is not casual for a casual Friday. I pity the teachers who have such strict dress codes. So stifling. If my students can wear booty shorts and diaphanous leggings with abandon, then I can wear my sartorial choices, none of which include exposing my derrière.

In case you wanted to see me imitate Mr. Ed, here you go...
You can't unsee that. 

Outfit Deets:
Cardigan: NY & Co (I like this one.)
Blouse: current, Lauren Conrad via Kohl's (exact)
Pants: White House Black Market (cute)
Flats: Mia via DSW (a different navy pair)

Here's a close up of the shirt:

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Polka Dots and Lace

This morning, I assumed today would be craptastic because my visor broke and I had to fix my ingrown toe nail (TMI? It hurt.) 

However, today was awesome. The windows rolled down to the perfect height so as to create a breeze but not mess up your hair kind of awesome. 

My second period did not want to review for tomorrow's test because they love the book that we're reading so much they asked to keep reading! You probably have no idea how big this request is for the population that I teach. They gave the characters personality, read with inflection, and happily discussed what was happening. If you've never read it, you should. It's called Monster by Walter Dean Myers. It's written from the perspective of a 16-year-old boy who's on trial for felony trial. He alternates between diary entries from prison and a screen play of what happens in the courtroom. 
Check out Walter Dean Myers here

Later in the day, a student handed me a copy of a book that he really loves (Rumble Fish by S.E. Hinton) because he wants me to read it and discuss it with him. I cried a little. 

Great day in the classroom, guys. 

I give all of the credit to the dress that Momma bought for me. How could my day suck if I was wearing a cute, lace dress that Momma dukes picked out? 

FYI: Taking pictures in a busy parking lot qualifies as awkward.

Outfit Deets: 
Cardigan: Old Navy (SO 10 years old)--(similar)
Dress: Gift from Momma (she got it at Kohl's, of course)--(similar options from Kohl's)
Belt: Francesca's (LOVE this belt so much)--(similar from Gap)
Boots: White Mountain? I bought them a year or two ago. (similar from Boot Barn)
Necklace: Kohl's 

Linking up with WIWW

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Pink & Cobalt & Mouse Poop.

Since we're tiling the kitchen, I have to play Frogger every morning in order to make my breakfast. On an ordinary day, I'm a troll in the morning, and that's a generous estimation of my attitude. I assure you that my troglodytic behavior does not improve when I must dodge everything in my path in order to fix my beloved oatmeal (with brown sugar, blueberries, and walnuts, of course). When said oatmeal explodes in the microwave that I can reach only by leaning precariously over the uncured tiles, my mood plummets even further into the depths of crapdom. HOW do hoarders do it? I can barely function for three days let alone half of a lifetime. 

At the end of the work day, I left my computer for maybe thirty minutes and what do I see upon my return? Mouse With 26 students and another teacher in the room, how did Fivel go unnoticed? Today didn't like me so much. Exploding oatmeal and pooping mice. 

However, I fancy this outfit. I decided that I can wear white pants if my thermometer reads a whopping 92 degrees. A blazer when it's blazing hot? Not terribly smart, but I'm committed to my blazer collection. I added this beauty recently. Ain't she purdy?  

I really love this outfit. I guess I like variations of this color combination. After all, I wore coral and navy yesterday

Outfit Deets:
Blazer: New York & Co. (new--exact on sale)
Blouse: New York & Co. (not new--similar)
White pants: Express via Gabriel Brothers (I'm almost positive I bought them in 8th grade. similar from Express)
Belt: New York & Co. (not new--similar)
Shoes: Jessica Simpson via DSW (love these

Linking up with The Pleated Poppy and Shanna

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Coral & Navy & Craaaazy.

Today, it happened.

One of my students informed me that I was wearing pants that she owns. Exact color. Exact store. Exact brand. Not the exact pair. That'd be creepy. Of course, I probably paid less since Momma dukes poops 30% off coupons for Kohls. 

Riddle me this: if my student owns these pants, then why is she always wearing sweatpants to school? Furthermore, why ARE people always wearing sweats, yoga pants, or leggings in public? I mean, if you just finished an intense Bikram session (I still contend that yoga is cruel and unusual punishment for an overactive sphincter), super. Get down with your spandex or sweatsuit self. Are you running a 118 degree fever and need some sludge from CVS in order to reenter humanity? Okay, I'll let you slide., If you just finished learning at a desk in a climate-controlled classroom, why do you need to wear these items of clothing every day? And don't give me the "but they're comfortable" excuse. I'm not buying what you're selling. I own plenty of jeans that are as comfortable as sweats. In fact, I own many dresses and skirts that rival all sweats, leggings, and yoga pants. Sloppy on occasion is acceptable. Sloppy by nature? Not cool. Unless it's your rap name. And then it's really not cool. 

If I look like crap on a stick, then I feel like crap on a stick. I can kiss all productivity goodbye. However, if I feel like a hot tamale, then I'll be on fire all day. I speak the truth. 
Dress for success and stay classy, San Diego. 
(If only I didn't hate Will Ferrell so much...)

You probably don't care about my redundant rant, and that's okay with me. I do hope you like my outfit; however, I'll still wear it even if you don't dig it. If I avoided wearing what people made fun of me for, then I never would have rocked those bell bottom leggings in elementary school. (Seriously, if you're going to wear leggings, at least be cool like mini me and wear bell bottom leggings.) I miss those pants. And all of my flannel shirts. Oh, wait, I've already accrued a healthy collection of adult-sized flannel shirts. Giggity.  

Outfit Deets:
Pants: Elle via Kohl's (exact--I seriously want them in orchid, too.)
Blazer: Marshall's (similar)
Shirt: Target 
Belt: NY & Co.
Earrings: Target 
Scarf: Made by Momma dukes, of course ;) 
Shoes: I think they're Mia. I know they're from DSW. 

Linking up with Mollythe Pleated PoppyStyle Elixir, Tori, and Shanna

Friday, April 5, 2013

Tile Store

Good afternoon, folks.

I'm making this one a quick one because we're back to work on putting in new flooring in the kitchen and dining room. We've hit quite a few hiccups, so things are progressing slower than we anticipated. However, that's pretty normal with this family.
Anyway, we went to the tile store this morning to pick up more thinset and grout. I decided to look presentable for the first time in five days. You're welcome.

It's a converse kind of day.

And now for the full-body shots (not that kind of body shot, perverts.) 

We need a new welcome mat.

Wish us luck on today's tiling adventure. (Actually, we have yet to tile. Like I said, lots of hiccups. More like a belch.)

Fun fact: right after Jeff took these pictures, I dropped my sunglasses and popped out one of the lenses. Luckily, the lenses pop in as easily as they pop out. Awesome. 

Outfit Deets:
Sweatshirt: Target clearance
Striped shirt: Target
Jeans: American Eagle
Converse: DSW
Sunglasses: NY & Co. 
Scarf: Made by Momma :)

Check ya later, home skillets!

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Coral and Black Striped Dress

I know that barely anyone sported black on Easter Sunday, but I was determined to wear this dress, which required tights and long sleeves. Now, was it frigid outside on Sunday? Not so much. However, I always anticipate that my in-laws' house will be set at a subzero temperature. My bones don't do cold, so I packed on enough layers for the occasion. Plus, I think coral is a bright, fun enough color for Easter Sunday, right?

My ten-year-old niece was sitting next to me during the meal. At one point, she looked down at my seat, reached out her hand to touch my dress, and said, with her eyes wide open, does your dress have pockets? I didn't think I could love that kid anymore, but a fellow dresses-with-pockets lover instantly scores more points with me. We also had the following conversation that made me love her more and question my intelligence:

Me: Do you watch Once Upon a Time?

Niece: Yes, do you?

Me: Yes, but I'm so bummed. I missed last week's episode and I forgot to DVR it.

Niece: You have ON Demand, right?

Me: Yeah.

Niece: You know you can watch the show on ON Demand, right? Just click the ON Demand button, click on TV shows, and find your show.

Me: ...seriously?

Thanks to her, I caught up on the previous episode before watching last night's episode. The fact that my techy husband had no idea about this fun little feature makes me feel a lot better about my ignorance.

Aaaaaand, to distract you from my stupidity, here is my cute outfit.

Only shot that shows you the wonder of my POCKETS!

I wanted you to see my headband with the bow on it because I like it.

Awwwwkward arms.

Outfit Deets:
Striped Dress: Target ( several colors)
Black shirt: Marshalls 
Boots: b.o.c via DSW (exact, in brown or black)
Scarf: Not a clue, folks
Earrings: Target (I'm obsessed with these things.)

Oh, and I was finding old papers in my car while Jeff drove to his parents' house for Easter. This outfit was inside of a coupon booklet for The Limited. I was excited because I can recreate it with clothes in my closet. Heck yeah.

Linking up here (Pleated Poppy), here (with Shanna), here (Style Elixir), and here

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Tasty Tuesday: Savory Salmon Salad

How about that alliteration? You dig it? I dig it. 

As you can see by the title of this post, Jeff Boyardee strikes again. My man can cook. 

Luckily, he writes pretty well, too. I edited a few commas and periods, but I barely touched what he wrote. Hooray for less work. Oh, and for the record, this salad is DELICIOUS, gluten-free, and anti-inflammatory. The dressing might just be the best thing since sliced bread, especially since I can't eat most sliced breads. 

Cedar Plank & Lemon Pepper Salmon Salad 
with Tartar Vinaigrette

Excuse the poor quality. My husband sent the recipe as a .pdf file, which meant I had to take a screen shot of the image that he included in the file. Good grief.

-Flank of salmon (steelhead trout is a great choice, too) 
-Lemon pepper seasoning
-Cedar plank

-Red Leaf Lettuce (or romain)
-Pine nuts
-Pickle slice/quarter
-Olive Oil
-Mayo (we used Nayonaise, which is and egg-free, soy-based version of mayo)
-Brown sugar

Preparation Fish
1. Soak the cedar plank for about 20 minutes in water.
2. Pour a little olive oil on the wood where the fish will lay.
3. Put the fish on and season with lemon pepper and some chunks of butter.
4. Throw on the grill for a while until cooked (about 20 minutes)....I used a charcoal grill just because its better

Preparation Salad
1. Slice up the lettuce, tomatoes, cucumber, and strawberries. Mix together.
2. Heat up the corn (usually we use the one in the steam bag) and mix into the veggies 
3. Mix in the pine nuts

Preparation Tartar Vinaigrette
1. Blend a pickle slice/quarter with 2-3 tbsp of mayo
2. Add some olive oil to get a thick and creamy consistency 
3. Salt and Pepper to taste
4. Add 1 tsp of brown sugar and continue to blend

1. All of the veggies are already mixed, so give them a toss to mix them up 
2. Plate the veggies and put a few chunks of salmon on top of the salad 
3. Pour some of the vinaigrette on top and serve


Should take about 40 minutes (unless you soak the plank earlier...then its just the time for the fish, as you will prepare the rest as it cooks.)

Monday, April 1, 2013

Mom made me cake.

And I threw it away.

After I ate half of it. In two days.

People of the internet, hear me: I have no self control when it comes to sugar. I don't buy or make anything with sugar in it because I know myself; I'll eat all of it in two days. I will then proceed to itch like a fiend and feel like a team of hamsters moved into my stomach. I'm like one of those small children who eats too many of the sugared candies in the pretty glass bowl at Grandma's and then slugs around on the plastic-covered couch, flopping from side to side and moaning about a belly ache.

I am still a small child.

Mom made me my very own gluten-free, chocolate-free cake on Easter because she loves me. In two days, I ate half of it. Today, I had to throw out the rest because I knew that "hiding" it from sight by stashing it in the lazy Susan would not prevent me from remembering its existence even though that container of cottage cheese could be sitting in front of the refrigerator for two weeks and I'd "forget" about it. Also, it would not keep my husband from noticing how quickly the cake started losing its rectangular shape and turned into a mound of crumbled, sugary remains from my haphazardly digging into it (while my husband wasn't looking or listening because of YouTube videos about goats screaming) with a plastic spoon that lay next to the dish out of convenience, not forgetfulness.

If you're reading this, Mom, I'm sorry. Your cake was too delicious. Circumstance forced me to throw it away before my face became a pizza, and my digestive system decided to pack up its shit and get out. (Pun intended.) And, since Mother Nature visited me on the very day that you handed this cake to me, I really possessed zero control over my cake cravings. Who am I to argue with nature? If my husband even mildly liked sugar in some form other than Oreos, then I could share my cake with him. No, sir, the task of eating that 8x8 dish of Heaven fell to me and me alone. I couldn't very well feed it to the dogs and risk an astronomically high vet bill. So, I ate half of it, felt guilty, and fed the rest to the avocado and strawberry graveyard inside of our trashcan.

If you're reading this, Husband, I'm sorry. You might come home to find me sitting on the floor, criss cross applesauce, crying in front of the trashcan. No, not over spilled milk, my dear. Over cake. Over the cake I impulsively dumped into the trashcan and then beat up with a plastic spoon so that it was so irrevocably smashed into the smelly remains of yesterday's food that my dignity would eat me before I even considered rescuing the homemade icing and vanilla fluffiness from the depths of the refuse pile. I weep because I'm too smart for myself. Too smart for my lack of self control that now wants to kick its self righteous other half in the ass.

I'm sorry, self, you can have your cake, but you cannot eat it, too because I threw the rest of it away.

*sniff sniff*