Friday, May 23, 2014

My Outfit is Boring, but(t) My Words are Not.

Essentially, the only non-boring things about this outfit are the "statement" necklace (which isn't even full of color, just plain ol' clear, fake crystal or whatever) and my butt. In fact, I think my butt makes more of a statement than my necklace does. Of course, I feel that my butt tries to steal the show every day. Why must a skirt on a girl who's my height look significantly shorter on me? Oh, that's right. I have a behind that robs my thighs of extra material. No matter what pants I pull on, whomp (rump?), there it is. Oh well, I guess some butt is better than eroding butt syndrome, from which most men suffer. You know very well what I mean. Those dudes whose knees look like they're trying to reach the ground because they provide the stability a non-existent butt cannot. It's like the behind is just sliding away on a slippery slope, which is a terrible comparison considering the content. Anyway, I don't know why I'm comparing rumps with men in the first place, but here we are. 

What other blog can you visit and find outfit pictures commingled with awkward paragraphs about poop, butts, or something equally unsettling? If you know of such a blog, I would like to make friends with its author, so send them my way. 

P.S. Did you see what I did with the title there? Of course you did, smart reader. 

The Look:
Sweater: Elle via Kohl's (it has little nubbins on it)
Necklace: The Limited
Pants: Banana Republic via thredUP (they're the sloan fit pant)
Heels: OLD and from Marshall's


  1. When I saw the title, I was like "are we talking about butts today?" And yes, yes we are. Not to be weird (I mean, you started it), but your butt seems to be a reasonable size! Are the pictures misleading? Do you have a honky tonk badonkadonk?

    I don't really have much junk in the trunk. My friends have lovingly named it a 'non-ass.' I should probably do some lunges or something. And that's probably why I hate pants. If they fit my waist, they are saggy in the butt. Not cute.

  2. I don't think your outfit is boring at all. I think it just shows that when wearing basics, you can still look good. And I really love that you talk about butts and stuff. This is the funniest fashion blog I've ever read in my life.

  3. I love simple looks like this! Though I guess it leaves less to be discussed, so butts it is! Like Andi said, maybe the pictures are misleading? But you seem to have the right amount of butt? (I know those are worded as a statement, but I'm thinking them like a question. That's how I roll, sorry English teacher.) I think my butt would be regularly sized if it weren't for my crazy wide hips, hence more distance to cover for my behind. (I can't believe I'm typing this all out haha).

  4. You crack me up every.single.time. Are you getting excited for the end of the school year? When are you done? Our last day is June 20th which still seems sooooo far away!

  5. Only on your blog would I find such humor about butts. And hey, butts are great. If you've got it, flaunt it! Especially in those pants! Just because an outfit doesn't have color or 5 different layers that we don't have any idea how one is still able to move under all those clothes, doesn't mean it's boring! Plus, you're wearing leopard print shoes which means your outfit is anything but boring.

  6. I think my favorite posts of yours are the ones in which you talk about poop and butts and other such things. I mean, these are pretty standard topics of conversation in my daily life, so the fact that I have internet friends that talk about the same stuff is pretty awesome. I haven't been able to find any other blogs that talk about these things (other than Camp Patton, which is a lifestyle/mommy blog and cracks me up - I don't read any other mommy blogs because they usually bore me, but Grace is freaking hilarious), but if I do, I'll fo sho share with you.

    Also, I love your outfit. Those pants make your butt look gooooood.


Feel free to throw some witticisms my way.