Replacements: A Coat Review

I decided that I know exactly what I like to wear, so shopping has become a lot easier for me. Since I know which items I always reach for, I have been making a list of the items I wish to replace with something that will last me longer than a year. This coat is replacing one I bought for $20 last year at Forever 21. Unfortunately, despite that coat's warmth, it is a dirt magnet, and it's too short to wear with boyfriend cardigans. I know full well that coat will make it two seconds into dry cleaning before it disintegrates, becoming nothing but a pile of fibers.

I considered another Forever 21 replacement, but I didn't like the options for one of many reasons: cheetah-print fur inside, elastic sleeves, strings hanging all about (I have another coat from there, and all of the strings hanging around annoy me to no end), too short, more expensive than the one I got from AE, or sold out. They have a LOT of options, but none of them surpassed this coat for me.

I love any coat I can spend less than $100 on. Luckily, American Eagle had a Black Friday promotion for 40% off, so I decided to make this coat mine. I toyed with the rust version of this coat and decided it would not go with as many items in my closet. I also considered the black version of this coat, but then I wouldn't want to wear it with brown because I'm weird like that. I decided that the green would be versatile. If you are considering a coat like this one, I will tell you my pros and cons:

Pros:
* It covers below the butt, which means it works well with boyfriend cardigans, and I love wearing boyfriend cardigans.
* It sits a little higher in the front, which I like because it prevents me from feeling like a sausage.
* It's cinched in the waist, so it actually gives me a shape other than rectangle. (The one I'm replacing makes me feel like one shape.)
* From the chest upward, it is lined with some pseudo fur, making it much warmer. (I am always cold in the chest because I lack insulated flesh in that area.)
* The lining in the hood can be removed.
* I love the gold zipper and buttons.

Cons:
* The lining is only chest high, which might bother some people. However, it's lined in the same spot I am always coldest, so I am not sure how much it will bother me that it's not lined in a place I don't feel as cold.
* There are no side pockets. However, you can tuck the pockets' flaps inside of the pockets and stuff your hands into the pockets very easily.
* The sleeve length is a little short. I always wear gloves and my sweaters usually peek out of jacket sleeves, so I'm not sure how much of a problem this con will be.
* Sometimes, the lining pokes out of the sleeves, but I have this problem with pretty much EVERY coat ever.

For the record, I am allergic to both down and wool. (Some wool coats are okay, however.) So, coat shopping is not easy for me. Thankfully, this coat contains no allergens. Woo. Add it to the pro list.

The Look:

Tee: Target 

Cardigan: Old Navy // exact?

Scarf: Francesca's 

Pants: J.Brand via thredUP 

Boots: b.o.c. via DSW 

Contrasts

Just a quick hello today because I took the day off in order to write college letters of recommendation. In total, I have 44, which is a significant amount, and I have no idea how the number grew so large. I just think these kids are so great and they ask so nicely that I cannot say no. So, here I am, curled up in my soft blanket and warm sweatshirt, perched on my desk chair, cranking out as many super personalized letters as my fingers can type.  Wish me luck?

Until then, look at me being all bad to the bone in the first outfit and very prim and proper in the second one. I always ask my students to compare and contrast things. Look at the contrasts here, people.

The Look:

Crumb Catcher (scarf): Made by my momma

Shirt: J.Crew Factory 

Jacket: got this bad boy for $25 on thredUP, can't remember the brand

Jeans: High-rise American Eagle 

Boots: Simply Vera (Mom got them for me from Kohl's) 

The Look:

Top: New York & Co. 

Jeans: The Limited

Heels: J.Crew Factory

That's all I have for you today. Time to write more letters of recommendation now. 

What exactly is boho chic?

I feel like I tried this shirt on with every pair of shorts that I own. All of them either looked stupid or no longer fit me. What gives? I'm working with slim pickings. The end of July quickly approaches, so is it worth it to buy more pairs? What are your thoughts on the matter?

My brain can function only in a list right now, so here it is.

One, what is boho chic? I guess it means hippie inspired, flowy fabrics. I'm going to say that this top qualifies, especially because I chose to wear it for exactly that reason. I did not want to feel constricted, so this top felt like a formidable choice. 

Two, doesn't this shirt look like a henna tattoo? The stitching reminds me of henna. Is that weird? If the rest of the top weren't flesh colored, maybe I wouldn't think so. Ah, who knows.

Three, I can't believe I wore a bracelet today without throwing it across the room. Usually, I will attempt bracelet wearing and grow so frustrated with its clanging against the keyboard that I angrily toss it off my wrist. This one slides up far enough that it's out of the way when I type. Looks like I know what kind of bracelets to look for in the future.

Four, no one would know we are in the summer season based on my pasty skin. Will that mean everyone my age later on will look like a rawhide, and there I will be with lovely, unwrinkled skin? I will tell myself this lie in order to feel better about having nothing to show for the sunshine and summertime once school starts.

Five, a few weeks ago, a mouse scurried across my foot as I reached for a 2a.m. snack in the kitchen. A few days ago, a spider fell on me in the shower. Yesterday, a bug crawled up at me out of the toilet. Today, I saw a cockroach crawl OUT OF THE SINK. Why do I even bother cleaning this breeding ground for disgusting things? I think I need a bat. Or a chicken. Or a toad. They can eat the creepy crawlies. Have you ever seen Stephen King's It? You know the part when the clown comes up out of the drain? Yeah, that's my reality. I can laugh things off, but even my sense of humor has its limitations.  

 The Look:

Top: Francesca's (really cute and similar)

Shorts: Jennifer Lopez via Kohl's (exact in two washes)

Sandals: Sole Society (exact) 

Cuff: gift from Mom awhiiiile ago

 I also wore the top this way. As you can see, I'm super creative with it.

Linking up for shorts week with Andi and Ginny.

Black Dress & Green Accessories

Not long ago, this dress fit me better, so I feel a little sad that the top looks and feels looser than it has in the past. Since I began a pretty restrictive diet as a countermeasure to two solid months of antibiotics and steroids, I have lost probably 8 pounds that I didn't need or want to lose. (Honestly, I just want to feel better, and I'd rather change my diet than take more pills. After all, medication is what landed me here in the first place.) I am even trying to eat more often. Luckily, my doctor approves of the diet and even gave me a blog to visit for tips on gaining back some weight while cutting out foods that could cause me harm right now. In fact, he printed out the main page from the blog and handed it to me. The solution? Eat more fat (coconut oil, olive oil, avocados, eggs, etc.) to replace the lack of sugar and carbs.

Quick recap of what I'm not eating in an attempt to kill an overgrowth of yeast in my body: sugar of all kinds (even fruit, except for lemons and limes, for a short while), processed foods, peanuts, most dairy (except yogurt), rice, corn, pork, potatoes, beans, fermented foods, and pretty much anything starchy/high in sugar. (Essentially, all "trigger" foods are out of my diet.)

Quick recap of what I am eating: almonds, walnuts, buckwheat, quinoa, vegetables (and lots of them), fish, chicken, eggs, turkey, beef, coconut oil, avocados, lots of spices on foods, lemons, limes, plain yogurt high in live cultures, olives (in water, not vinegar), and oat bran. (It's amazing how many recipes I've found to match up with these ingredients.)

By the end of August, I will reintroduce some foods in small doses like some vegetables that are more starchy (ex: sweet potatoes), low-sugar fruits (ex: blueberries, strawberries, and green apples), and beans.

The diet has been manageable for the past month until Mother Nature and all of her cravings hit me today. I think I hallucinated pizza at one point. Know that this cute outfit and I hung out on Monday. Today, it was all about the sweatpants, ugly hair, and an HGTV marathon when I wasn't napping. At least I know I possess a willpower something fierce. I need to channel that same willpower when I'm shopping.

A big shout out goes to my husband who has tirelessly researched foods to eat and ways to help me through this journey. In fact, he's eating all of the same meals with me and offered no complaints when I asked him to go grocery shopping today and buy feminine products for me. (He even knows exactly which kind to get.) What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man. Yes, he is.

 

The Look:

Dress: Target (similar, inexpensive option)

Sandals: Franco Sarto via TJ Maxx (exact)

Belt: Target (similar)

Necklace (with a little cut out shaped like Maryland): Lou Lou in Georgetown (lots of options at this Etsy shop)

What I Wore & Did: Hanging Out in Georgetown

So, as you might already know, I met up with Whitney last week in Georgetown (Washington, D.C. for those of you who aren't familiar with the East Coast). Since I'm a native Marylander, it was not my first time in DC, but my first time in Georgetown. I'm in love. As I drove into the city, I ogled the beautiful homes lining the streets--none of them the same, all of them exquisite. I told myself that getting lost wouldn't be such a bad thing because of such a great view.

As for Main Street Georgetown, HELLO, CUTENESS. When you look up Georgetown "shoppes" online, it will appear they offer about ten stores. Oh, no. They have everything, and the stores are all so deep. It's like entering hundreds of Narnias. Before shopping, however, we stopped for lunch at Pinstripes, which also boasts locations in Illinois, Kansas, and Minnesota. Seriously, this place is the best place I have ever ordered food, and most of you know how many food allergies I have. I ate the maple glazed salmon with avocado salad and quinoa; they let me do butter instead of a maple glaze. On top of the great food, it also offers bowling and bocci! Indoor bocci pits? Whaaaaat? I loved the restaurant so much that when our friends from New York visited, we took them there for lunch on Saturday. These friends are serious foodies, and they raved about the food and atmosphere. Win. We all high fived at the end of the meal.

Meeting up with a fellow blogger for the first time is sort of like preparing for a first date. When Whitney said the same thing to me at lunch, I knew we'd be forever friends. We both changed outfits about five times before settling on what we'd wear for our outing in Georgetown. SO MUCH PRESSURE. I opted for this skirt with a black shirt and my giraffe necklace. When Whitney and I went into Aldo, the sales girl said she had the same skirt that Whitney also has in another color. I remarked that I would love it more if it had pockets. She said, "that's weird. Mine has pockets." I decided to investigate that very moment. And what do you know? IT HAS POCKETS. I have owned this skirt for an embarrassing amount of time not to notice that the pockets were so well-sewn shut that they existed at all. Clearly, Whitney is good luck.

Here's what I wore on my two trips to Georgetown in one week. 

She exists in real life! And she is even more adorable and sweet in real life. I loved her denim vest and midi-length dress!

 

Our favorite New Yorkers. (I opted for my Converse this day.)

Thank you to the random dude who took our picture after looking at me in the most dead pan of ways and saying, "No" after I asked him to take a group shot. You got me, dude, you got me. 

Oh, we did not mean to dress up as if we were getting professional pictures our coordinated outfits in the park. We're just that good. Naturally.

 

Wish me luck on my cleanse.

I found my perfect floral shirt. Aren't the colors so vibrant and lovely? You're seeing it for the first time here even though I've had it for almost a month. Also, you're seeing proof as to why I should wear sunglasses for all daytime pictures. What's up, squinty? 

The end of the school year is winding down quite nicely. My sophomores' speeches are hysterical. On purpose. My juniors' debates started out swimmingly. Their progress this year astonishes me. I just finished writing a letter to my AP classes, which I may share with you next week. (I am almost finished writing a personal note to each student in those classes.) Should I finish writing my exams first? Probably. Whatever. It'll all get done on time. Fear not. 

You know what's weird? Being thin and telling people you're going on a cleanse. I don't think that most people understand cleanses serve greater purposes than losing weight. Like recovering from three months of antibiotics and trying to force your system into recovery. I'm essentially trying to hit the restart button on my body. Every damn time I take antibiotics, I get thrush/some crazy yeast overgrowth. What feeds yeast? Sugar. And carbs that turn into sugar if not burned off quickly enough. Now, without a gall bladder, I cannot survive on juice cleanses. My system would revolt and shut down. We can't have that. So, for three days, I shall be eating just vegetables, steamed or raw. Luckily, I've never met a vegetable I didn't like. Wish me luck. I'll probably want a handful of strawberries by lunchtime tomorrow. Who am I kidding? I'll want them by breakfast. 

The Look:

Shirt: The Limited

Cardigan: Target

Jeans: American Eagle

Sandals: Franco Sarto

Earrings: Francesca's

My Outfit is Boring, but(t) My Words are Not.

Essentially, the only non-boring things about this outfit are the "statement" necklace (which isn't even full of color, just plain ol' clear, fake crystal or whatever) and my butt. In fact, I think my butt makes more of a statement than my necklace does. Of course, I feel that my butt tries to steal the show every day. Why must a skirt on a girl who's my height look significantly shorter on me? Oh, that's right. I have a behind that robs my thighs of extra material. No matter what pants I pull on, whomp (rump?), there it is. Oh well, I guess some butt is better than eroding butt syndrome, from which most men suffer. You know very well what I mean. Those dudes whose knees look like they're trying to reach the ground because they provide the stability a non-existent butt cannot. It's like the behind is just sliding away on a slippery slope, which is a terrible comparison considering the content. Anyway, I don't know why I'm comparing rumps with men in the first place, but here we are. 

What other blog can you visit and find outfit pictures commingled with awkward paragraphs about poop, butts, or something equally unsettling? If you know of such a blog, I would like to make friends with its author, so send them my way. 

P.S. Did you see what I did with the title there? Of course you did, smart reader. 

The Look:

Sweater: Elle via Kohl's (it has little nubbins on it)

Necklace: The Limited

Pants: Banana Republic via thredUP (they're the sloan fit pant)

Heels: OLD and from Marshall's

In Honor of Jack

Recently, one of our beloved science teachers lost his fight with cancer. On Facebook, one of my colleagues posted that Jack was the only person she ever met whose eyes had an actual twinkle in them. Truly, Jack might have been Santa's belly-less and beardless brother. He was a man who radiated positivity. I didn't have to spend a lot of time with him to know that everything about Jack was wonderful; he even smelled nice. (After a day with teenage funk, a lady learns to appreciate the finer smells of life.) 

His wife, a retired English teacher who used to work at our school, is equally as lovely, and she just so happens to own the best vocabulary of any human being on the planet. Even their daughter, who worked with me at summer school one year, has the most pleasant personality. Something about that family radiates warmth. 

In honor of Jack and his love of the hockey team, the Capitals, we all wore red. Of course, I decided to take it to the next level, and wear all of the team's colors. Here's to you, Jack. You live on in the hearts of everyone you've touched with your kindness. 

The Look:

Shirt: Old Navy

Cardigan: The Limited (old)

Skirt: via Marshall's

Shoes: Sole Society

Necklace: The Limited 

Sunglasses: LOFT via my mommacita 

Making Friends at Neiman Marcus

Color is awesome and all, but I do love a sharp black and white look, too. Now, this dress is a smidge   too short for work, but it's a hot little number for dinner, which is where I wore it. On our first night for the Neiman Marcus event, we ate dinner in the hotel's pretty restaurant. I donned this dress and threw my leather jacket over top because I never know when I'll get cold. 

I have to admit that I worried about this event a lot beforehand. Images of pretentious, too-good-to-be-around-me women danced above my head. Seriously, I'm a high school English teacher who thinks prairie dogs are the best animals at the zoo and talks about poop far too often. Fortunately, everyone involved proved my fears wrong. On the car ride from the airport to the hotel, I met one of the Beauty Department Managers, Pat. Hailing from Florida, she is kind and a good listener. She also appreciates my sense of humor, which is a key factor in my deciding someone's worth. 

When I arrived at the hotel, I met coordinators, Caroline, who was quiet with a nice smile and gams I wish I had, and Dru, a petite fellow gluten-free lady. They were the women behind the scenes of the whole operation. The first winner I met was Jessica, who just graduated law school in South Carolina. We immediately hit it off and both found great comfort in the fact that we considered each other "normal" (not all uptight and persnickety).  I met Ashley, a writer and essential genius from Hawaii. (I'll be honest: she can wear J.Crew like no one I've ever met, and she can rock a pixie cut like a boss.) I loved talking to Gale, a doctor from California. She is the head doctor for Paul Walker's non-profit organization, ROWW (reaching out worldwide). I might just have to visit her in CA. I enjoyed meeting all of the girls, but my Beauty Department Manager, Claudio, takes the cake. That guy knows his way around the beauty department (he'd make a good teacher!) and he truly understood my sense of humor. Possibly to his dismay, I'd be his BFF if we didn't live 8+ hours apart. 

Quite honestly, the free clothes and gifts were awesome, but meeting new people was the best part for me. (Plus, I loved getting my mom on a plane for the first time in 40 years.) Actually, the best part about life is the relationships that we build. Am I right? And our relationship with ourselves counts, for the record. Now, that is the beauty of life, folks. 

The Look:

Dress: Banana Republic via thredUP

Shoes: BCBG via Boscov's 

Necklace: The Limited

The attack of the bumblebees isn't just a song. It's real life. My life. I decided to amuse you with my antics. 

Mom said, "Well, taking pictures of your clothes is most important. I'm trying to get a picture of your necklace. Smile." And I gave her this...

Sweet neck muscles, eh?

Essays aren't the only things in need of revisions.

When Mom and I took pictures of this outfit, I hadn't considered the blustery, rainy, cold front that would pass through on the day I planned to wear it. When I actually wore it, I pulled a typical me and tucked in the shirt, belted the pants, and threw on a white blazer. (If you follow me on Instagram, you already saw this look on Tuesday!) Anyway, I felt much better in the revised version because it felt more "me." I know blogland is all "HALF TUCK THE SHIRT," but I typically prefer a full tuck for work outfits. I feel more polished. When you deal with teenage funk all day, anything that makes you feel more put together prevents that "I think I smell like teen spirit now" feeling. 

Anyway, I can't believe I once considered ousting this top from my closet. Its sunny yellow disposition rubs off on me, and it worked perfectly for this week's Trendy Tuesday theme, bows. The ladies wore bows in their hair, shirts tied in bows, shirts in bow print, and headbands with bows. The gents took the opportunity to wear bow ties. (Check me out on Instagram if you want to see how I revised the look for a frigid classroom.) I also switched from these shoes to a lower heel that also sported bows on the front. How appropriate. 

The Look:

Shirt: New York & Co.

Pants: Express (the Columnist in slim cut)

Shoes: via DSW

I also wore the shirt this way:

(crappy picture but the blazer is navy)

I also wore the heels this way:

(I had to donate the shirt because it shrunk and same with the cardigan.)

And the pants this way:

Linking up with

* What I Wore to Work (http://www.mixmatchfashion.com/)

* Tres-Chic Fashion Thursday (http://vodkainfusedlemonade.com/)

Local Love & Lace

Who is not smitten with alliterative titles? People who wouldn't know awesomeness if it poked them in the ocular. That's who. People who deliberately give their children alliterative names, on the other hand, are being almost as cruel as people who name their child after their surname (Phillip Phillips...really?) Maybe I'm just jealous of people with alliterative names. Who can be sure? 

I am back and in action, folks! If you could have seen me literally whip my head back and forth--not as intensely as Willow Smith--as I typed that, you'd surely want to know me in real life if you don't already. I am SO back that I am showing you two outfits today. Oh me oh my. 

I wanted you to see how I dress up and dress down this lovely lace shirt. Something for work and something for play (or casual Friday for those of us whose places of employment are lucky we don't wear stained sweatpants to work on Fridays...whichever).

This shirt is yet another one of my finds on thredUP, which I am almost as smitten with as I am with alliterative titles. Okay, maybe more. The leather jacket, which looks super expensive if you ask me, was a $25 find on thredUP. Cha ching. I think it's turned into my favorite place to shop. They might as well put me on the pay roll. Feel free to be sick of me talking about thredUP. 

However, if you're interested in a post about how I find awesome things on thredUP, I'd be happy to oblige. Just let a sister know. 

The Look:

Blazer: Express (old)

Shirt: LOFT via thredUP

Skirt: The Limited 

Shoes: BCBG via Boscov's 

Earrings: Local boutique called Sweet Elizabeth Jane (find them on Facebook!)

I keep finding the cutest and really reasonably priced (these earrings were a mere $6) jewelry at this boutique in the downtown shopping area near me. Sweet Elizabeth Jane has the cutest housewares and jewelry and trinkets and skirts and ALL THE PRETTY THINGS. If you're ever in downtown Ellicott City, Maryland, check it out. You'll thank me later. 

I smirk like I know what's up. 

Meet outfit number two, my ticket to bad assery, which autocorrect does not think is a thing. Rest assured that it is. 

The Look:

Leather Jacket: Buffalo by David Bitton (via thredUP)

Shirt: LOFT via thredUP

Pants: Celebrity Pink via Boscov's

Flats: Steve Madden via DSW

After I came up with this week's outfits, I cruised Pinterest, which probably should have happened the other way around. Anyway, I realized that this outfit must have been subconsciously inspired by Ashley; I pinned her look 9 weeks ago. Man, it must have really stuck with my brain? I didn't even have this shirt 9 weeks ago. I must also be prophetic. 

Thanks to Sarah and Lucky B Boutique for making me stretch my brain with their April Challenge. 

Today's look is inspired by the "local love" theme (this look was as well, but I needed to make sure I didn't double up on my themes.) I am a rule follower to the core. 

For your viewing pleasure, here is another way I've worn the skirt:

(original post)

And another way I've worn the pants:

(original post)

I'm nothing if not thorough. 

Seeing Spots

Typically, Jeff remains cautious about commenting on something that I'm wearing (smart man), so if he actually says something, then I know he's being honest. After Mom took pictures of this outfit, Jeff declared, "I really like those pants." Any man who encourages crazy prints and bright colors as much as I do is clearly meant to be married to me. 

When Sarah promoted the April Challenge, I immediately thought of these pants for both the cropped and geometrics themes. THEN, when Marissa and Heidi posted their Pantone Challenge, I realized these shoes would be the perfect pop of dazzling blue color for this outfit. Ah, I love it when things just fall into place. 

Thank you to all of you who have sent me get well wishes. I am so glad I chose to get surgery over my spring break because it gives me ample time to recover. However, one can watch only so much TV before wanting to run around furiously in circles. I am going STIR CRAZY. I am about to make friends with the spiders or actually begin conversing with Ellie, my elephant-shaped humidifier. Luckily, two of my colleagues are coming to visit me today. 

Talking to humans is preferable. 

The Look:

Top: LOFT (gift from Momma)

Pants: New York & Co. 

Necklace: Poshmark shop

Shoes: via Kohl's (I really do love these shoes.)

Cute little Rudy (a.k.a. Rooster)

After looking at the front of his head, can you see why we nicknamed him Rooster? So much fluff on the top of his head. 

I also wore the top this way...

original post

The pants this way...

original post

And the shoes this way...

original post

Also linking up with 

* Shanna (http://becauseshannasaidso.blogspot.com) 

* Pleated Poppy (www.thepleatedpoppy.com/blog)